Thursday, February 12, 2009

Moon

So I know a lot of yall are wondering: What's up with the moon picture??. Well There's this awesome game called Persona of the Shin Megami Tensei series made by Atlus. That game has elements of various different religions and the like, it was there I was introduced to the Tarot Cards and the Major Arcana. So just for fun I thought I'd pick one that kinda reflected me and my personally based on SMT's interpertation of each Arcana. I went with the Moon, the 18th Arcana.In Persona you meet people whose situations deal with and reflect each arcana.

In Persona 3 the person reflecting the moon arcana is a kinda heavy-set dude named Nozomi. He was known as the top Gourmet around town, he also was a member of a cult and was rumored to pull a scam on some of the locals, for this he was picked on by other students and some adults. But all-in-all he was a good guy, a little misunderstood and shunned from other for his shadyness and mysterous ways.

In Persona 4 the person reflecting the Moon arcana was a stuck-up self-centered girl named Ai. Named to be the Cutest girl in the Yasogami High school, but she was cruel putting herself first and shooting down guys if she thought they werent on her "level." But as the main character gets to know her she comes clean about how she was called ugly and outta shape in Grade School. Her family became rich and she moved to another town where she started all over and believed that she had to act uppity to be accepted and wanted by the guys. Heh turned out she's not half bad once she stopped lying to herself and started being who she really was. She was a mystery to herself leaving others in the shade cast from her own confusion.

Take a breather, that was alot of stuff. Now back to me right?? :-3

What I've gathered from this is, the people who reflect the Moon arcana are mysterous, and sometimes that causes people to shun them or misunderstand them. They also seem to be loners weather it's because of people not understanding them or from the person themself pushing others away. These people also seem to be very emotional, and occationally overthink simple situations turning them into complex ones.

What do you think of when you think of the moon??

"Shining" alongside the darkness without interupting the flow, constantly "shining" even in the darkest dark. Mysterous maybe even onmious it's eerie glow, it's many shapes it takes as time moves on. You may have noticed that I quotated the Shining parts of the previous statements. For those of you that dont know, the moon doesnt really shine, the light that we see is light from the sun reflected by the moon. The different phases are caused by the shadow casted by the Earth which gets "bigger" or "Smaller" as the moon revolves around the earth. Thats where my interpetation kicks in.

I'm not your average guy, I think and act differently than most people around me. Some people are intimidated by that, others misunderstand me and avoid me because of it. But my X-factor is my charm, though it repels many, the ones that do stick around stick around long and become special friends to me. I'm also very emotional which used to bother me; doesnt really seem like a Masculine trait huh?? This too is a part of my charm, I can connect with people on a whole other level than most guys because of it. Of course it has it's drawbacks but I'm learning to get to most out of it, and making sure people dont mistake Kindness for Weakness. Truth be told I love nighttime, there's just something about the night sky that's peaceful to me. Just like the moon I'm also laid-back, I like to take it slow and move smart rather than rushing blindly. Just as the Moon reflects the sun's light I shall reflect God's love and continue to radiate even in the Darkest Dark. The clouds may block the moon but it continues to reflect and radiate, So even when things may seem cloudy, you may think I've stopped shining but look again, behind it all I've never stopped. And just like the Moon occationally the earth casts it's shadow upon me, I may not seem like myself from time to time but I've never forgot my Identity or my purpose. I am Wayne Jessie Jr. and even when the Shadow of the earth is upon me, it is only temporary and I WILL shine again, bank on it.

I hope my words have shaken you to your core, and given you a deeper perspective of my mind and personality; how they work though my eyes. Think of me next time you gaze into the night sky, give me a smile huh??


Friday, February 6, 2009

Reflection

Tonight I faced a part of myself, it brought me closer to the truth. I admitted the truth that's still too unbearable to speak, I forced myself to understand that truth and came to terms with myself on how to handle that. A huge amount of me is still unknown to myself, but as I continue to improve and move onward I'll get to know myself even more and be one step closer to the me I'm meant to be. I did what I had to do because I'm too selfless; I tend to care about other people more than I care about myself; Looking back now that is crazy. I do however, understand that everything doesnt revolve around me, s'all about finding the medium. You had to go, or else my suffering would continue. Know this: Wayne Jessie Jr. is continuously improving the design and the algorithims of what it's means to be Wayne Jessie Jr. It wont be easy but I will face myself and come to peace with myself in order to correct the corrurption in my life self-inflected and otherwise. Indeed time moves on and thus, Wayne moves on, unstoppable, and regardless of any situation or circumstance. Heh that's funny, the guy I'm looking at in tha mirror seems more mature somehow...

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Shadow

Imagine everything about you, good and bad, saintly and wicked, ugly and nice. The unfaceable parts of your life. What if all of a sudden you were faced with the unfaceable; that being all of the things aforementioned. Could you face yourself?? Would you conquer your shortcomings and admit your the facts of your trueself, or be devoured by your shadow??

I ask these questions because it's something I've been thinking about lately...to tell you the truth I couldnt call it for myself. To see all of me, all of the parts of me that I keep surpressed stand before me and expose all of me; it would be terrifying. I might not be able to handle it...if such a thing could happen. Do you ever think about your subconsciousness?? Do you ever get the feeling that your subpressed self is more inteligent than yourself?? I feel like this sometimes, and it's hard to explain but it's just a feeling...I'll stop now, maybe you're confused. Hell maybe I'm confused but these are the kind of things I think about.