Smile

What's this?? A smile?!? Yeahhhh that's right, I feel goooood today. I cant really explain it I'm just happy. I cant believe I actually got to the point where a smile looks unnatural on my face but I must say, it's a good look aint it?? lol. In the midst of all of my problems and trials I still manage to keep my sanity and my joy. I konw I have alot of work to do and that I will complete kill my weekene to do this work since I blew off work last week and during the weekdays. However, my mind isnt really on that right now, today I think about my good friends, my family, classmates, the potencial of relationships to come, all of the bonds we share. It really makes me feel good and I can say I'm happy about the way I'm living my life right now. Today is already looking to be a good day, as I do my work this weekend I look forward to what's to come next in preparation to take the good and the bad...with a smile knowing that it will all workout.

Just remember through the good, the bad, and the ugly; sometimes you just have to take a step back and think about all of the blessings that are in your life right now. Make peace with your self and dont forget to smile :)

Sloth

My lazyness is getting the best of me again, I really need to rededicate myself to my studies and my body. Lately all I've been doing is playing the game...I will fight to overcome this lazyness and make tomarrow a better today...let it begin.

Crunch time

~~Finals and Projects upcoming, may every student scramble to get all of the studying work done on time. Sizing up their grades "will I pass this one??" lets hope so. Late night education sessions and rough mornings out of bed to finish what could not be finished in the last night/early morning. The weeping off students who couldn't get the work done, the cry of the ones that curse Procrastination for bringing them to this point, The Cheer of those who got their work straight and has no fear of the oncoming onslaught of work, The sigh of those who have given up, All these and more can be heard as the semester comes to an end. All semester there is whinning and complianing about how the semester should end quicker and wishes of the end coming closer, faster. Compliants satisfied, wishes granted, you got what you want are you ready?? No?? Guess it's crunch time then!!~~

That was a free write that I just felt like writing, I wanted to express how i felt about this rush of work the I know we all are going though. Man this is getting crazy, Some classes are killing me now, and I was doing so good in them earlier on in the semest. on the other hand there are some classes where my grade has been good all the way across; gonna need that to stand strong in the presence of the classes that I may look kinda shoddy in. And Fin Aid's gonna be pissed, if I fail any of my classes than I wont be a full time student anymore and I'll lose my aid...I'm already on Academic warning and if my GPA isnt up to par I'll get Academic Probation...I think I'll be ok though, I might not have to worry about that one. I'm struggling and stressed but I'm not giving up. I'll make it somehow, God will make a way.

Thanksgiving Break

So last week was Thanksgiving Break, We all have alot to be thankful for but living life from day to day, doing the same mundane things over and over again, causes us to think that everything that we are so lucky to have from day to day is promised to us and that we deserve all that we have. I for one, stopped to realize all of the things, people and etc in my life that I am lucky to have and I'm so thankful for it all.
It was also good to see my family, the first day was alot of fun. I left around 3 pm on last tuesday, 64 was a little rough but I made it safely home around 6 or so. no one was there...I got a little worried because I wondered if they when to Maryland and forgot that I said I was coming home for Thanksgiving. They went shopping in Gloucester, came in around like 10 or 11. I met up wit everyone and saw one of my classic movies on Starz: Mighty Morphing Power Rangers the movie. Call it what you will but that was my favorite movie growing up, so I watched it for old times sake. I came home with my pockets looking right trife so I was looking forward to working with dad to make some money, but appearently even his business is being effected by the economy and he really didnt have any room for me to work with him, which was ok with me I had a trick up my sleeve. I call Mr.Kulpa, my HS band director, who now runs a printing company in Lottsburg, which is about a half an hour away from me. Hoping he had some room for me, but alas he told me he had nothing for me, he was flattered that I asked though. So I was stuck. What was I gonna do for money??(keep your dirty comments to yourself...that;s another story LMAO) I was stuck at the house alone, the kids went to school, the folks went to work. I started off just watching TV, DVR'ed some Inuyasha and watched some other shows, then I decided to clean the house a little, did the dishes, dumped the trash cans and the dog food, cleaned up the den, which has become my new HQ since I'm now forced to share a room with my little brother. I even stopped to play around on the piano a little, I noticed that I have a real gift to hear music of anykind and then reproduce it on the piano just like I heard it...only thing is I cant play it with both hands yet, I'm not ambidexterous and I can only control one hand on the keys at a time...but I believe with practice I could get that down pact. My sister came home first by then I was playing the game so she joined in, then my Brother and Mom came in at the same time so lil bro joined in the gaming, the three of us always do it like this, Brawl, Mario Kart, I showed them Bomberman they liked it, we always game and have a good time...had I known what the week would bring I woulda treasured this day more...various events happened in which I'm not at liberty to discuss here, I'll just say that rules were in place, and where they werent common sense shoulda took over...it didnt and long story short my sister was in a funk for the remainder of the break. Thanksgiving day came, me and lil bro helped mom in the kitchen because my sister was in her room and still in a funk. Dad did a little bit of work and me and lil bro played Mario kart in which he did actually beat me a couple of times...when it was time for the Thanksgiving dinner things were a little awkward because although everyone was there it was quiet because of the tension between the folks and my sister. everyone was gone exceot me and mom and we talked for a while, it was funny cause my mom is a trip, we talked about shows we like to watch and we talk about all sorts of other things from traveling to maturity and immaturity. I helped clean up and went back to playing the game with my brother, Dad even jumped in and played too for a while. The rest of the day was spent sleeping and in front of the TV but I had fun for sure. Friday dad found some work for me to do, I painted the ceiling of the den and went he came back home we all did some yard work. Me and Maurice(Scooter H) were sorting the truck and dad was working on a piece that goes to a roof. After a while I was to gather all of the copper just lying around the yard. It was a pain but it kept me busy and paid nicely, I also got money from cleaning the house wednesday so my pockets were healthy again but I needed to keep this money for a little bit longer, that and since the family didnt go anywhere neither did I so I chilled at the house made some phone calls and the like. saturday I was taken to te bank to get some money for my account that I use at school after that I went back home and chilled until dad came from work and mom came back from shopping. My sister was in her room still not comunitcating with us...we decided to go to Newport news and upgrade our phones and whatnot. So we did that and it killed my pockets... :( but the phone is niiiiiiiiice Verizon Voyager, I've wanted one every sicne they came out last year. The whole rest of the night was spent on playing with that. yesterday I came back to ODU after saying goodbye to my family...still no words from my sister...but anyways now I'm on the grind doing alla this work that is due this week. Expect to see more I think I'll start writing poetry seperate from this blog and occacationally bring some of it here for yall to see. I was inspired by some poetry I heard over the break, I used to write good poems and I think I can do even better now that I'm older and exposed to more things being more mature and whatnot. Well I dont know if anyone is reading these posts cause no one writes comments on my posts...to anyone out there that may be reading my posts, you can leave me comments, as long as they arent spam I'll approve it...I'm actually looking forward to some feedback...if not well then continue to enjoy the Life of the DJ2xway.

For my God

At this time I just wanna put my life on hold and give my God some praise. God is just so amazing and I Just wanna thank him for being in my life and watching over me, even though I dont deserve it. I went to EI's Homecoming Explosion and it was great!! The songs I heard and the dances I saw reminded me that God is indeed where my help comes from and that I never would have made it without him.
Lately I havent been in the church like I know I should be, and though I never stopped living God in my life that was still wrong because I know there are other things that I DID do and I know I coulda just gone to church and praise the Lord. I'm so unworthy of God's Love, and it's not fair, that God still loves me even though all of my sins and strife. I dont even have to be here right now, there are at least 3 or 4 times where I can say I should be dead, But God saw it fit for me to be here anyhow, And when I look at the way I'm living my life all I can say is that I'm unworthy...And this is the part that gets me the most: He STILL loves me and watches over me, Making sure I never want for anything. When I think about his love I'm filled with happiness and graditude for all that was done for me. So right now I just Wanna say Thank you God for all that you've done in my life and I just ask that you use me as you see fit, father. And if I cant do anything for you then at least I vow to try to do less against you. I ask you for your strength to help me resist these fleshly desires and walk with me everyday that I might touch someone the way you have touched me father God. In your name I pray and ask, Amen.

Kansha(Graditude) by: Real Street Project

"I spend all my days here the same way,
chilling out, relaxed and unconcerned.
There are so many things to do,
a lot of them impossible for me.
It's totally overwhelming,
but I'm always ready to do what I can,
because everyone here has a smile on their face.
I may not say it very often,
but I am really grateful for all my family and friends.
The time we spend together is so special,
I could never replace any of them.
We've got this moment, we've got each other
stopping, standing, and laughing together.
I'm so thankful I could cry.

This feeling is so wonderful,
it makes today sound like a wild dream.
I promise you, I'll never forget it, my precious ones
who laugh with me, support me
and keep me going.

This feeling is so wonderful
it makes today sound like a wild dream.
I promise you, I'll never forget it, my precious ones
who laugh with me, support me
and keep me going. "

As the title states I am not the author of these words. The author is a (group/band??) named: Real street Project. This song wasnt even sung in english but it was translated for us. It's words are my exact feelings towards each and every one of my family and TRUE friends.( And you know who you are ;) )

I just wanted to share it with yall cuz It made me think of my feelings for alla yall. Thank you for being my friend. I love all of yall and will always be there for you, Bank on it.

So it's November already is it??

Sorry guys and gals, it has indeed been a while. I have been exceedingly busy and lazy(not the best combo) so I havent been doing a good job keeping up with this huh??

I recieved so updated info on some pain from the past, it stung for a while but now that I know the truth about it all, I'm free.

In other news my academics are looking good right now, and they should. I'm working my butt off and my social life is hanging on by a thread haha. While I patch my social links back together I have made a few more interesting links that could be promising hmhmhm.

I got sick, or so I thought. A check-up with heath services told me that the pain was mostly stress related. I was given Rx and with that, some time and some prayer I'm good as new.

I feel as though I'm losing some friends. I'm sure I'm not the reason for this, it's moreso that they are becoming more busy and meeting more people so their time decreases. I take note of that and be very cautious that it doesnt happen to me, but at the same time that friends dont take up all of my time, gotta find the medium.

Work is kicking my ass...and I have naught to show for it but my ass!! I dont need this. I got to find a better one but this one is very flexible, and I need that cause my schedule isnt all that great...cmon pops call me when you need me cause I need the $$$

Caught up on Shippuden and now working on Bleach. cmon Naruto learn that new move quicker!! Bleach is getting intense. from the last time we've talked I jumped form the end of the bounts to the invasion of Hecho Mundo and the break in of Las Noches. Cant wait to see what's gonna happen next!!

VIRUS!! I got hacked and had to roll back my data to a restore point from last year around christmas time...damn... but I saved all of my music and documents, the important stuff at least. the rollback brought back pain and an opportunity to cause issues. But I'm grown, and I am above childish movements and behaviors, I flatly declined.

I have yet to discover my one true calling or my best quality that I can use to improve my life and others. I just dont get it anymore, sometimes I wonder why God even bothered to spare me when anyone could have done the things that I do, quicker and with a better quality and quantity...I know I just stole myself in the face right there but I'm able to identify the fact that I have a problem with myself...I just dont know what that problem is or how to fix it...but I have grown from beating myself down to nothing and not even trying to understand. I AM getting better.

WOW Barack Obama is the next President!! this is MAJOR!! I was so exicted and happy that I could be apart of history in this monumental moment for my people. And regardless of what people may say, I think he will do great. May God be with us all so that this whole ordeal doesnt tear us apart as a nation, as a people, or as one in you God. And if something horrible were to happen to Obama then may God have mercy on the assassin(s) and may he grant us supporters understanding that such a hateful act not create more hatred and malice in our hearts and cause ruin to all we know and love. Have your way God, completely and totally.

well that's about it for tonight. I have to get up 8am for English...I have no more absents left to use, and after that breakfast and going home for the Oyster fest. cant wait to see my peoples and all the of the young ladies ima see when I get there. time to step my game up